Posts tagged ‘women’
Okay so we’ve all had a time in our lives when we felt like we needed to lay on somebody’s couch and talk. Talk about all the things that have gone wrong in our lives. Talk about our jacked-up relationships and ask that question, “What’s wrong with me?” Well, Dr. Michelle Callahan will tell you, “there’s nothing wrong with you that can’t be fixed.” LiveSteez had a chance to talk with Dr. Michelle about her book, “Are You Ms. Typed.” In her book she describes all the twisty-turny personality quirks that women often encounter while trying to find “the one.” But be warned, she keeps it real and will let you know, “you need to take some time to yourself and figure this thing out.” While it hurts to hear the truth, that’s all you’re going to get from Dr. Michelle, so brace yourself, and get ready to get down to the nit and grit of who you are, not who circumstances have made you!
Female Friendship Dilemma
Long lasting female friendships are hard to find these days. Why is it so difficult for women to remain friends for at least half of a life time? In my opinion, the most significant and common reason for a friendship failure is the absence of foundation. “We are friends because our boyfriends are friends” isn’t the most stable foundation for a friendship. You are more like temporary partners in crime with similar goals in mind. After giving the friendship dilemma some more thought and doing a little research, I came up with the following reasons.
Envy has destroyed many female friendships. Simply explained, you have something that she is lacking or missing. Whether it’s a designer purse you bought, a new man you met or a rewarding job you have, she is never happy for you. She always points out the negative in everything positive that happens to you.
Phone Phases of Relationship Life Cycle
Conversation #1. Introduction Phase.
Man: “Hey there.”
Woman: “Hey. Hi. How are you?”
Man: “I am ok. And you?”
Woman: “Just finishing up some work.”
Man: “Good. You know I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Woman: “I have been thinking about you too.”
Man: “You looked so great last night.”
Woman: “Thank you.”
Man: “I was wondering if I can see you tonight?”
Woman: “Well, we could meet around 8.”
Man: “That works. Iw ill pick you up.”
Woman: “Ok. I’ll see you later”
Conversation #2. Growth Phase.
Fact 3
“Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice.”
Bill Cosby
If you want to revel in body confidence, turn off that self-critical tape that’s on a loop in your head.
● Quit cracking “jokes” about your body. “Even casual, half-kidding self-assessments get lodged in your brain as truth,” says Jeffers. Get into the habit of censoring yourself every time you’re about to utter a derogatory comment like “I’ll probably need a minus-A cup for my pancake chest.”
● Put yourself in the hot seat. “When negative beliefs creep into your mind, fight back and challenge each one like a trial lawyer,” says Mininni. If you think, I’ve gained so much weight, ask yourself What evidence is there? Have I had to throw out my old clothes and buy larger sizes? If the answer is no, you’ll have to face the harsh truth— you haven’t packed on the pounds.
● Listen to what those voices are really saying. Insecure thoughts can be deceiving. “They usually occur because you’re feeling powerless or scared in some aspect of your life,” says Los Angeles hypnotherapist Nancy Irwin, PsyD. So when that inner bitch taunts you, ask What’s really bothering me? Maybe you had a spat with your guy or you’re anxious about work. Identify the true source of your angst so you can ditch self-hate and tackle the real issue.
● Look at “I’m a hottie” evidence. Beth, 29*, blasts her body blues by flipping through a photo album she’s filled with the most flattering pictures of herself. “Seeing proof that I am attractive, despite what my mind is saying, makes me feel great about myself again,” she says.
● Enjoy being eye candy. Do you ever burn with self-consciousness when a guy checks you out— even if it’s your boyfriend trying to cop a stare as you make a dash sans clothes to the bathroom? Learn to love being ogled and your sex appeal—and confidence—will go through the roof.
● Step into his headspace. We assume that guys are just as hard on our bodies as we are, but that’s so not true. “Men admire the whole package,” says psychologist Sheenah Hankin, PhD, author of Complete Confidence. “They don’t pick you apart, and they don’t look longingly if they’re not liking what they see.” So when a babe is feasting his peepers on you in bed, remind yourself that he’s appreciating the scenery, not cataloging your “flaws.”
How To Live Happy With A Man
1. Don’t overanalyze every word he says. Like for example: he tells you now – both of you are in your late 20′s or early 30′s – that if you were to gain a lot of weight in 30 years, he will leave you. Don’t let that mess up the next 30 years of your life.
2. Give him some space. Try to let him discover some things on his own. This way he won’t lose his mind if you are ever out of town.
3. Be independent. Pursue your own interests. Do something with your friends,or take up a hobby. Note: He can’t be your hobby.
4. Loose your needy and attention greedy attitude. As attention needy as men can be they still fear needy women. If you live his life, who is going to live yours?
5. Don’t look busy. Be busy. Ignoring his phone calls to teach him a lesson can be a real torture. Not being able to pick up the phone because you are in the middle of something very important is so much fun.
How To Know A Player
Don’t we think we recognize a player when we see one? A promiscuous man who knows – oh so well – how to read between your lines, who looks deep into your eyes and your heart starts beating faster, a man you would want to have all to yourself…
Then, all of a sudden – right when the birds of love are rehearsing the happy love song in your head – his presence begins to fade away, his phone calls become rare, and you turn into a restless creature spending most of your time ordering greasy Chinese food, stuffing yourself with chocolate and ice cream. You blame yourself for ignoring the red flags, for listening to his sweet voice but not hearing his words, and for letting yourself fall in his arms. You question yourself what went wrong but you can’t find the answer. The answer is you got played.
There are three types of players: player for life aka collective player, trial player, and last but not least, lovesick player. Each type might have different motives, similar intentions but the outcome is identical – your feelings will get hurt.
Player for life aka collective player is the most dangerous species among male players. He is a player by choice. As a true womanizer he has many years of experience. Enchanting women comes natural to him. He can easily identify his next victim just by looking at her for a couple of minutes. He knows exactly what she wants him to be, and it brings him great pleasure to slurp in the role she wants him to play. He likes to collect women as precious exhibits. He loves the challenge. The more challenging you are the more persistent he will become, and the longer he might stick around. He constantly falls in and out of love, and believes that unfulfilled love can be romantic. Once you get over him you will recall your encounter with him as a beautiful and passionate moment of happiness.
Fact 1
Men take significantly longer to get over their lost loves than women.
